Recently, a good friend sat in my dining room and scolded me for not being able to gracefully receive a compliment. It’s true. I squirm, I deflect, and I feel so self-conscious I want to climb the walls when someone showers me with nice words.
There has been a whole lot of light and attention directed my way lately, mostly because of the flattering and unbeleivabley kind piece at Tales from the Crib, and again I find myself wanting to deflect attention and melt into the wallpaper.
My friend was right- she often is, and this is something I need to work on- but not today.
Thus, the same friend who scolded me about grace and compliments had a little wicked fun coming up with things I suck at- it was a blast! Here are a few; this is by no means a complete list!
- Computers. Yes, I blog- and have for almost two years now, but I didn’t even own a computer until two years ago. My idea of fixing a problem with the mechanical little demon involves beatings with a shoe and lots of naughty words. As a matter of fact, just last week I realized I could play music on this thing! Did you know that? Apparently the entire western world knows that, but not me.
- Gardening. Ugh. I hate it. Hate hate hate it. It probably doesn’t help that I’m allergic to the entire botanical encyclopedia, but there it is. My thumbs are black. What can I say. I hate itching, and sneezing, and I hate the endless-ness of gardening. I am plain bad at it. I have enough dirt in my life with 3 and 5 year old boys- no thanks.
- Once upon a time, I took a pottery class, and try as I might, with all my might, I simply could NOT get the dang clay to spin into a bowl, cup, or anything remotely resembling a vessel of any kind. This ticked me off. While there are things I suck at, usually artistic things come easily- it really bothered me that I couldn’t do this. I still can’t.
- My fuse is short, and burns hot. The only good thing is, it burns out quickly.
- Delegating. Ugh. I would rather not be in charge of anything, because I cannot delegate. Let me just be the rank and file while someone else calls the shots, because if I have to be the boss, I will try and do it all. It’s not pretty.
- Dancing. Oh, you have never seen anything so sad as me trying to keep a count and a tempo. It’s worse than Elaine. Really. I look at people who groove and move with grace and rhythm, and it’s like listening to someone talk Armenian. It’s pretty, but I have no idea how to make myself understand.
- Music. Oh, holy craptastic, this is the bomber. Singing, music, rhythm, tempo, time… The Good Lord shortchanged me here. Even my three-year old asks me to stop singing in the car, and will actually cover his ears in church and yell at me to STOP! Yes, I am totally serious. Music I adore, but never, ever ask me to contribute. You will be sorry.
So there. What do you suck at?