Sesos Con Queso

Lately it seems like my brain is firing on about 2 cylinders. When I go back and look at some of what I’ve written over the years, there were some grand ideas, pulled off with aplomb. I like some of the things I’ve written- only lately, it kind of seems the well has run a little, um, slower.

Have I really used up all my original ideas? Have I said all I need to say in the world? The answer to both those questions in an unqualified “Nope”- but yet, here I sit, dum-de-dum, not much happening in the ol’ noodle. I’ve always understood why artists tend to seek the dramatic and chaotic- it really does make the best art- yet, I really don’t want any more drama or chaos in my life. Does my art suffer for it?

I mean, it’s not like we’re coasting on our laurels or anything- criminy, we’re going on almost 5 months of unemployment, we had a dangerous and scary sidetrip down a dark alley last month, we had a health scare, Beanie is getting an IEP to see why he regularly bursts into flames- and we’re running out of funds sometime soon. And yet, here I sit, dum-de-dumm.

My writing has been lackadaisical, my painting progress has been nil, my sewing is neglected, and I haven’t worked up any new textile designs in almost two years. My old ones are still selling, but I just don’t care all that much.

Having a husband at home all the time has thrown me for a meteoric mental loop. It’s always Saturday around here. Having David at home lets me run errands and have more free time than I’ve had since becoming a mother- but we have no spare money, so I can’t really tackle many projects. The kids routines have been flushed; they are defiant and whiny, and I actually threatened to sell them to the Gypsies this weekend.

Summer is bearing down fast, and I’m quivering in my flip-flops. We’re only holding onto the barest glimmer of a routine, and with school ending in a matter of weeks, I find myself terrified at the idea of having not only all three kids home all summer, but my husband too. Go lock yourself in a room with your entire family for a few days- get back to me on how you feel when you let yourself out.

I fear I may end up resorting to lots an lots of TV for the summer- and that my children will sprout little TV-cords from their behinds, just like ol’ Jimmy Jet and his TV Set. Really, who wants that?

We pretty much skipped spring here, too. It went from the 60’s to the 90’s overnight. No acclimation, no warming up- just winter, then POW, hotter than a cat on a witches brass bra. Or something like that. Grandma isn’t around to ask for funny sayings anymore. I mess them up anyway.

17 thoughts on “Sesos Con Queso

  1. “hotter than a cat on a witches brass bra”…

    Holy cow, I’m laughing, but seriously, what does that mean? Why do witches have cats in their bras? And why are the bras brass? Questions, questions….

  2. My well has been dry and I haven’t nearly your excuse for being drained.
    I do hope you can find something to keep everybody out of your hair for spells. Staying sane is always a nice perk.

  3. people always wonder why I say that when my husband stays home from work, it totally ruins the kids routine. I love the man, but sometimes he just gets in the way! So I can totally relate and absolutely admire you for making it through five months of having Daddy around all the time! I hope that sooner than later he finds work and relieves your home of his constant presence.

    Even when you have nothing to talk about, I still enjoy reading… hope the well doesn’t dry up completely!

    my grandma used to say it was hotter than Dick’s hatband on a hot day.

    or that it was raining so hard it sounded like a cow pissing on a flat rock.

  4. You’re allowed to be tired during this experience of your life. It’s emotionally, mentally, and spiritually draining. That kind of tired just makes one…really tired. Really, really, really tired. In fact, I’m just tired thinking about it! But if it makes you feel better, your posts that are “slower” are still awesome. And I enjoy them immensely. :)

  5. I think I’m weird in that I love having my hubby home. But I know many many women who disagree with me.

    I personally think you should buy my house in Utah…in for a penny, in for a pound, right?

    Things can only get better, right?

  6. I’m with the Wiz, I really like having hubby at home. But I totally get why a lot of women don’t. I used to hate it, and then a couple of years ago he was home for 6 MONTHS STRAIGHT!!! I thought that I’d go insane. Then I realized that it was great for the kids to see dad doing things around the house (for once). Anyway we adjustedm, but it did take some time. Good luck and make sure to get your “me” time in while he’s home.
    And I thought the saying was “colder than a witch’s t***y in a brass bra”

  7. Heather, I’ll give it a shot.

    I think the phrases are “quick as a cat on a hot tin roof,” “colder than a witch’s t$t,” and “cold enough to freeze the b*lls off a brass monkey.” The fun thing about southern slang is that variations are encouraged, so you can get a whole lot of mileage out of a few good phrases. “Slicker than a pig on ice” morphs into “slicker than snot on a doornob.”

    Someone put the poor witch in a brass bra and others said she was cold and someone else thought that bra would be hot in hot weather. Brass conducting both heat and cold very well, it’d make a VERY uncomfortable bra in unpleasant weather, dontcha think?

  8. I just had this conversation today. I have FULL TIME child care at my home. I don’t “work”. I am less organized and fruitful now than I have ever been in my life. My kids are whiny-er (the Gypsies wouldn’t want yours, they just returned mine!!) and less settled. It is very strange b/c this is when I should feel MORE organized. Granted, my “person” isn’t my husband but essentally a paid empolyee, but it still serves the purpose of throwing off the routine.

    So, it isn’t just me?

    As for the souther sayings, they make me happy. I grew up in Tennesee and have a million of them.

    Love whatever you write. Where can we see your fabric designs? I am dying to see them.

  9. Thank you Jami. I feel ever so much more enlightened. And I LOVE “slicker than snot on a doorknob”. With your permission, I believe I will use that one around here sometime.

  10. On a totally unrelated note, I just got back from an IEP for one of my sons. I was stressed out and grumpy and, frankly, scared over it all morning–why? who knows? Anyway, I now feel grateful for the people working to help my son be all that he can be (though not in the Army). Hope you have a similar positive experience.

  11. I feel slight guilt for being on the other end of summer– I so need the break that it brings… even if the school board meeting it will also bring means my job…

    Maybe the summer will bring warmer temps & other goodness to your home– I’m hoping it does!

  12. Do your children’s schools offer summer school ? (apply for grants/financial aid)

    Does your library offer any free summer programs?

    Does your Park District offer any financial aid/scholarships for any of their programs/day camps/pool passes?

    What days are FREE days at your local zoos and museums? (pack a lunch and go)

    Could you do daycare over the summer for money?

  13. You have a way with words, no matter what it is you write. I love reading it all.

    My hubby used to travel 3-4 nights a week for his job, so having him home more often now is really nice! Like most things in life, there are pros and cons to having DH here at home more often – and to having him work in an office or traveling. :)

    Where in AL did your grandma live? We lived in Dothan for 3 years. Love the Southern sayings!

    Hang in there!

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