Allow me to introduce you to the most disgusting, nastiest shampoo ever. Want to smell like an old mothball? Like the smell of wet-dog? Enjoy the way the old man down the street who sits on his porch yelling at neighborhood kids while smoking a stogie smells? Then this is the shampoo for you!

Recently my head has decided to be a little itchy and dry, and I normally love the Neutrogena product line. My favorite moisturizers, cleansers and eye make-up remover all bear the Neutrogena label. Even the T-Sal shampoo is wonderful, so it seemed a good bet to give this one a try. Big mistake. Like, seriously wretched mistake.

When I popped the bottle open in the shower, the viscous, nearly black gel glopped into my hands, and I was immediately assailed by one of most gag-inducing smells ever to come from a shampoo bottle. Still being swayed by misplaced brand loyalty, I thought “It can’t really be that bad- and maybe it will make my head stop itching…” Wrong! As soon as I sudsed up my hair, I knew the smell was going to make me wretch. Immediately I started rinsing and rinsing and rinsing… to no avail.

Three shampoos later, with all the fragrant stuff I could find, my hair still smells like mothballs. Really. And I still itch. I smell like an old man in a mothball sweater walking a wet dog. So if you like that idea, this is the shampoo for you. Otherwise, run.