I Think I Can, I Think I Can, I Think I Can…

School started today. After 18 months of this, I start my Senior Capstone work this quarter. I’m also taking four classes. Nineteen units. Because I’m insane? Yeah, probably. But mostly because unless I do I’ll have 2 straggling credits shy that will keep me from walking in May. And because of that, I can do this. I can. I have to keep telling myself that, because today? Was a doozy. And it’s not over yet. I’m home for all of 25 minutes, before I have to leave for my night class.

I’m doing my capstone, and I’m taking basic Algebra. Because in all the massive amount of credits I’ve accumulated, in all my perfect scores and 4.0 grades, I have avoided math until the last possible minute. I am terrified. But I have to do this. I would rather face hungry lions and divorce attorneys than take this math class, and the one that comes next, which is what I really need- but so help me, I’m going to do it. I only almost cried once today, when she was explaining the difference between rational and irrational numbers- brief flashbacks to flunking- but I dealt, and then I went to the book store and really cried when I saw my math text was $130. Yes, really. Puke.

Wednesday’s are going to suck. I have two classes at the main University campus, which is 20+ miles from my house- most of my coursework has been done at the downtown campus, but there are two classes only offered at the main, so Monday-Friday, to the main I go. Anticipation of this was a huge part of why I traded the Suburban for the smaller car. My other two classes are at my regular campus. It’s only about a 15 minutes drive. Jeffrey has Scouts on Wednesday night, and Abby only has kindergarten every other Wednesday, so this going to take some serious juggling… but… it has to happen. So I best figure out how to juggle. Fast.

I’m trying not to panic- the first week of every quarter is always hard while you get your bearings- and I keep reminding myself of that. I haven’t figured out how to get my books yet, but I’m going to keep looking for creative solutions, and I only have to do this until finals in December. That’s what I keep telling myself.

Somewhere between now and then, I have to take the GRE and apply for grad school too. I need a wife.

10 thoughts on “I Think I Can, I Think I Can, I Think I Can…

  1. I have nothing but respect for women/mothers who go back to school!! My mom did it when she was 45, and it was hard on all of us but the end result was worth it. You can do it Tracy!

  2. Okay you can do it. I had to start with almost the most basic math course that I didn’t even get credit on my gpa for it. It had been like 17 yrs since I had taken math when I started back to school Check with your math dept. There is a chance that they have a math lab of some sort that can give you help with your class.
    Good luck with your classes, I’ll keep you in prayers. HUGS!!!

  3. I dropped German this semester because the book, used, was just shy of $250. The rest of my books cost over $800, I had to pay an accompanist $300 for the semester, and I still have to fork over $200 for a choir dress that makes me look like five inches shorter and 40 pounds heavier. Yeah, I hear you on the text book thing! Ick.

    But if I know anything about you, it’s that you can do hard things. You dominate hard things, Tracy, and I’ve always admired you for it. Sending good vibes your way!

  4. Have you tried half.com? I ended up paying less than $190, instead of more than six hundred for books for my four classes. Also, I totally had flashbacks to fifth grade when I walked into my math class a couple of weeks ago. Soooo depressing.

  5. One minute at a time…
    I do admire you, more than you know.

    One minute at a time…
    Please let me know if htere is anything I can do.

    Lots of love, and even more prayers.

  6. Math is a specialty of Ray’s. Don’t hesitate to ask him for help! I learned the hard way that it’s better to ask him for help rather than trying to struggle through math alone. :)

    Keep those positive thoughts running through your mind! You CAN do this. You might have some “skinned knees” and such by Dec, but you can succeed. My unsolicited suggestion – though you already know this – is to cut yourself some major slack this quarter. Prioritize. Breathe.

    One day, one step, one breath at a time. It’s my mantra!

    And don’t forget yourself. Refill your bucket occasionally!

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