I #%*! My Computer

Yesterday my computer took a swan-dive into the lake of discontent. To say that it s..l..o..w..e..d down is the understatement of the year, and my computer skills being what they are, I was helpless. I have been known to fix computers by taking off (usually) my shoe and beating the computer with it; since this machine is less than a year old, I used restraint and had DFM call a friend to come take a look at it. Even making that call was progress for me…and an exercise in self-control.

So after several hours of twiddling and waiting for the computer to stop talking to itself like Rainman, things are better. Not perfect yet, but at least the thing doesn’t have a virus or something equally devastating. While the friend worked on my computer, he kept attempting to explain what he was doing, which is like talking Swahili to an Eskimo. Actually, I have to leave the room while computer talk is going on- it makes me feel like I can’t breathe and the walls are closing in… How’s that for un-tech? It’s really simple, actually. To me, computers are magic; they do or don’t do what you want depending on something like the computer fairies, and some (odd) people have the ability to charm the fairies and make them do what they want them to do. It seems like playing D & D or having a scraggly beard gives you an advantage over the fairies, but I am only guessing.

So today, I am making bread. I will pour the tiny, pearl-like grains of wheat in my grinder, make flour with a spinning stone, and knead soft, yeasty, good smelling dough. There will be warm flour all over my kitchen, the oven will make the kitchen toasty and cozy. When DFM gets home from work, the smell of hot, fresh, chewy bread will waft from the windows and greet him at the door. He will be a happy man, and I will be a happy mom. The perfect antidote after a day of computer hell. I might even make my own butter…