Okay folks, this is not for the kids- it’s what I make for me when I’ve got a hankering for some grown-up food. First off, use whatever pizza crust you like. I use Udi’s gluten-free crust, which happens to be the only GF food I’ve found worth eating (except Maggianos eggplant parmesan, but I digress). In my dreams, my crust of choice is Viccolo cornmeal crust- and if you have a Whole Foods or Trader Joes, and you can grab one- do it! My point is- any crust, whatever- because the crust is not the star. Onions, my friends, are the academy award winners here. And I’m going to tell you how to make your onions sing like a Castrati…

Carmelized Onion Pizza with Kalamata Olives

• Pizza crust, whatever kind you like
• 1 whole large red onion, sliced thinly
• 4 Tbsp butter
• 1/4 cup heavy cream
• pinch of salt
• handful of kalamata olives, run through with knife for rough chop
• havarti, gouda, goat or whatever cheese is in my basket. (you do have a cheese basket now, don’t you??)

1. Preheat oven to around 400*. Roll out or prep your crust however it needs, and set aside.
2. Slice red onion in half, then into thin slices.
3. Add butter to a hot saute pan, heat until frothy, and add onions. Spread onions out, sprinkle with a pinch of salt, and don’t touch them. They will caramelize if you leave them alone. I know, crazy. But its true. And here’s the secret: Let them brown, stir, let them brown again- really brown- then, add some water- maybe 1/4 cup. It will look like a sizzling, soupy mess, but the water will dissolve all the brown fond on the pan and onions, and will quickly reduce to thick oniony goodness. Repeat until the onions are soft and deep, caramel brown. No need whatsoever to add sugar. The salt actually draws out the natural sugar in the onions.
4. When your onions are deep caramel and there is no liquid in the pan, add the heavy cream and reduce until it’s a thick sauce coating the beautiful onions- about 3-4 minutes.
5. Top your pizza crust with these saucy, creamy, caramel onions in a nice layer. Add cheese of choice, and sprinkle with roughly chopped kalamata olives.
6. Pop that baby in the oven for about 10-12 minutes until bubbly and golden.
7. Mange.